from Stuff White People Like, by Christian Lander (because I said I would). My favorite entries include:
#2. Religions their parents don't belong to
White ppl will often say that they are "spiritual" but not religious. This usually means that they will believe in any religion that doesn't involve Jesus. The most popular choices include Buddhism, Hinduism, Kabbalah, and, to a lesser extent, Scientology. A few even dip into Islam, but that's much rarer, since you have to make real sacrifices and actually go to a mosque.
#6. Organic Food
[....]Never mind the fact that if the entire world were to switch to 100 percent organic food tomorrow there would be mass starvation and famine. White ppl don't care about this. As long as they aren't eating pesticides, they are pretty sure they can live together. It's almost guaranteed that if some Columbian drug lord can start offering "organic" cocaine, he'll be the richest guy ever.
#7 Diversity
White ppl love ethnic diversity, but only as it relates to restaurants.
#14 Having black friends
The most important role that black friends can play in white culture is that they can be used as physical evidence that white ppl are not racist. Did you know that if you are able to acquire a friend of every race then you are officially designated as the least racist person on earth? Though this is impossible, white ppl treat it the same way that Buddhists view enlightenment -- unattainable, but with great virtue in the attempt.
#19 International Travel
White-person travel can be broken into two categoris -- First World and Third World.
What's amazing is that all white ppl have pretty much the same experience, but all of them believe theirs to be the first of its kind, so much so that they return to North America with ideas of writing novels and screenplays about it.
*This entry made me finally go: "ah, this guy is talking about me!"
#28 Not having a TV
The number-one reason white ppl like not having a TV is so that they can tell you that they don't have a TV.
#40 Apple products
On the surface, you would ask yourself how white ppl could love a multibillion-dollar company with manufacturing plants in China and mass productions, and that contributes to global pollution through the manufacture of consumer electronic devices. The simple answer: Apple products tell the world you are creative and unique.
#47 Liberal Arts Degrees
*YES!!!! Hahah.
#50 Irony
*Again: YES!!!
The most horrific recent example is trucker hats, which shockingly went from mainstream in the '80s to ironic in the early 2000s and then almost immediately back to mainstream.
#67 Standing still at concerts
#81 Graduate School
Though professional graduate subjects like Law and Medicine are desirable, the true ivory tower of academia is most coveted, as it imparts true, useless knowledge. The best subjects are English, History, Art History, Film, Gender Studies, [insert nationality] Studies, Classics, Philosophy, Political Science, [insert European nationality] Literature, and the ultimate: Comp. Lit.
*SWEET!
This is getting lengthy. Suffice it to say: if you're a "white person" or want to understand this phenomena, get the book. I believe this guy also has a blog -- I saw it a couple of years ago.
Inscribed RestlessLiterati at 2:19:00 PM
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1 remarks:
lol. i hadn't had the chance to come see this. it rocked. i think the thing about Apple was the most hilarious. But not having a tv, organic food, and liberal arts degrees were funny to.
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